I agree with @whuber that this is a neat question.
I'm going to assume that each observation $s_{ij}^{(t)} = S_{ij} + \varepsilon_{ij}^{(t)}$, where $\varepsilon_{ij}^{(t)} \sim N(0, \sigma^2)$ (the noise is iid normal).
You can get an estimate for $\sigma^2$ based on the $s_{ij}^{(t)}$ values; I think the weighted average of the sample variance for each $ij$ should probably work okay. But we're going to work out the maximum likelihood estimate for $S$, for which we'll see in a moment that the value of $\sigma$ doesn't actually matter.
Now, of course $S_{ij} = -S_{ji}$. I'm going to assume that your observations already reflect that, so that $n_{ij} = n_{ji}$, and that $s_{ij}^{(t)} = -s_{ji}^{(t)}$. I'll also assume $n_{ii} = 0$, since we know $S_{ii} = 0$.
Then the likelihood function should look like
$$f(S) = I(\sum_i S_i = 0) \cdot \prod_{i=1}^n \prod_{j=i+1}^n \prod_{t=1}^{n_{ij}} N(s_{ij}^{(t)}; S_i - S_j, \sigma^2)$$
Thus, for an arbitrary vector $S$, the likelihood is 0 if the vector doesn't sum to 0, and otherwise is the product of a normal likelihood for each observation with mean at $S_i - S_j$. Taking the product over $j>i$ avoids double-counting observations, but for convenience, I'm going to instead multiply over all $j$ and take the square root below.
The problem of maximizing the likelihood function is then:
$$\max_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n} \sqrt{\prod_{i,j,t} \frac{1}{\sqrt{2 \pi} \sigma} \exp\left( - \tfrac{1}{2 \sigma^2} (s_{ij}^{(t)} - S_i + S_j)^2 \right)} \; \text{subject to } \sum_i S_i = 0,$$
or equivalently:
$$\min_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n} \sum_{i,j,t} (s_{ij}^{(t)} - S_i + S_j)^2 \; \text{subject to } \sum_i S_i = 0.$$
Expanding the square, dropping constant terms, and splitting up the sums, this is
$$\min_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n}
\sum_{i,j,t} S_i^2
+ \sum_{i,j,t} S_j^2
+ 2 \sum_{i,j,t} s_{ij}^{(t)} S_j
- 2 \sum_{i,j,t} s_{ij}^{(t)} S_i
- 2 \sum_{i,j,t} S_i S_j
\; \text{subject to } \sum_i S_i = 0.$$
But then $\sum_{i,j,t} S_i^2 = \sum_{i,j} n_{ij} S_i^2 = \sum_{j,i} n_{ji} S_j^2 = \sum_{i,j,t} S_j^2 = \sum_i \left( \sum_j n_{ij} \right) S_i^2$, where we just swapped the names of $i$ and $j$ for the second equality.
Similarly, $\sum_{i,j,t} s_{ij}^{(t)} S_j = - \sum_{i,j,t} s_{ji}^{(t)} S_j = - \sum_{i,j,t} s_{ij}^{(t)} S_i$.
Thus our problem has become (dividing the objective by 2):
$$\min_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n}
\sum_i \left( \sum_j n_{ij} \right) S_i^2
- 2 \sum_i \left( \sum_{j,t} s_{ij}^{(t)} \right) S_i
- \sum_{i,j} n_{ij} S_i S_j
\; \text{subject to } \sum_i S_i = 0.$$
Now, define $A$ to be the matrix with $A_{ii} = \sum_j n_{ij}$ and off-diagonal elements 0, $N$ to be the matrix with $N_{ij} = n_{ij}$, and $b$ to be the vector with $b_i = \sum_j \sum_{t=1}^{n_{ij}} s_{ij}^{(t)}$. We can rewrite the problem in matrix form as
$$\min_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n}
S^T A S
- 2 b^T S
- S^T N S
\; \text{subject to } \sum_i S_i = 0.$$
Dividing the objective by 2 again and doing a trivial rearrangement, we have
$$\min_{S \in \mathbb{R}^n}
\tfrac{1}{2} S^T \left( A - N \right) S
- b^T S
\; \text{subject to } \mathbf{1}^T S = 0.$$
This is the standard form of a quadratic program with just one equality constraint.
Now, $A - N$ is the Laplacian of the undirected graph where the edge between $i$ and $j$ has weight $n_{ij}$. It's therefore positive semidefinite, and the multiplicity of 0 in its spectrum is equal to the number of connected components (one, by assumption).
As with all Laplacians, since the row sums are 0, the vector $\bf 1$ is an eigenvector with eigenvalue 0. We also have that $b^T 1 = 0$, since that just sums all the (paired) observations. Thus, ignoring the constraint, the maxima of the objective function form a line. Of course, our constraint is a hyperplane normal to that line, so the constrained maximum is a unique point.
The solution satisfies this linear system:
$$\begin{bmatrix}
A-N & \mathbf{1} \\
\mathbf{1}^T & 0
\end{bmatrix}
\begin{bmatrix}
\hat S \\
\lambda
\end{bmatrix}
=
\begin{bmatrix}
b \\
0
\end{bmatrix}$$
If you run into numerical difficulties, there are many general QP solvers out there.
To get a confidence region on $S$, note that the feasible set is a hyperplane, and the likelihood function is (a monotone function of) a quadratic on that hyperplane. You should thus be able to find an ellipsoid about the MLE that contains any arbitrary amount of probability mass. I don't have time to work that out right now, but maybe I'll give it a shot later....
If you're not happy with the normal noise model, you can try the same thing for any other distribution. I don't know if it'll come out so (relatively) nicely, though.